Saturday, December 31, 2005


What is my life? What am I doing to it? What do I feel about it? What do I feel now?

*sigh* Why am I feeling as if there's no life at all? As if I'm not enjoying at all? As if I don't have a lot of friends? What am I doing here...alone in my room, facing non other than my PC, writing my blog...on Friday night? Surfing some forums.

I felt so alone and desperate now. I need to talk to someone. Why don't anyone call me? *sigh*

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

After a long break

Well, after a long break, my blog came back with a new look and this is my first entry ever since I changed a new skin for my blog.
Let's talk about my feeling's 12.31am, I should be in bed but at the moment, I feel ugly, old and pathetic. Not just at the's almost everytime when I look in the mirror, I know mirror mirror on the wall is the most honest object in the world. I see myself looking old and more than 24. At 24, I should look like 20, then I would be the happiest. I shouldnt look old at 24 and should let anyone commentted me that I look older than my age. was it because of my damn curly hair that I permed 3 months ago? I guess that contributes a lot. I'd decided to rebond it before the new year comes.
Second, my complexion....looks dull and dark all the time. Where has my fair and spotless face gone? Since when I have those eye bags and dark circle around my eyes??? And since when that I start to feel unsastify seeing myself in the pictures?Hmm...since I permed my new curly hair? Disaster >_<
And I just got a mosquito bite on my sick insect, thanks a lot for that. I'm going to kill you and your whole family for making a red bump on my face.
And there's no guy in my life right now. Joe? He's nowhere to be seen. Other than Joe there's no more guys in my life. Why is that so? Well, I don't mean to be a slut and get hook up with some guy other than Joe but at least some sparks in my life. I don't want to be like a married woman with no man approaching me like I'm a disease. This really decrease my self confidence.Well OK, we don't need men to be confident with ourselves. Yea, we don't need them. I just need to look pretty to have confidence. HAH!

You see, that's why I say I'm feeling pretty pathetic tonight. Better get some beauty sleeps and prepare to march to Unisem and continue my fucking work. Engineer...HAH!