Tuesday, June 10, 2008

I do.....

A trip to one of my best friend's wedding inspire me to write something about marriage. Something for everyone to ponder about.

Do you marry someone because you think:
A. He is a good man/woman. A total husband/wife material
B. It's about time to settle down. You had enough of fun already
C. Both A and B. Everybody has to end up in marriage whatsoever. It's just the right thing to do at the right time(refer to answer B) and you're with the right man/woman (refer to answer A).

I hope at this point, someone will be looking for another option D. You are truly, madly, crazily in love with this man/woman. Someone might disagree, saying love can't buy you a loaf of bread. But love can sail your boat a long longgggg way, through calm or turbulent sea. Bread? We can just finish it in a second and hungry for more.

While having dinner with my girlfriends, a saying/quote was brought up. One of my gf said, 'It is better to marry a guy who loves you more than you love him'. All my other gfs agreed. But I beg to differ. I said, 'Have to same same love la...' and she shaped her fingers into a 'L' shape....indicating I'm lame. -_- Even I'm a girl, I find it a bit selfish to think this way. Yes, I agree, everyone wants to play safe, but is finding someone that loves you more than you love him is the safest way, or the wisest way to a happy marriage?

I, too, saw the ugly side of marriage from my colleagues and friends. Somehow, somewhere, along the road, they met with someone better. Why so? Because the husband/wife is just good...but eventually not good enough. So there can always be someone better. Always, for sure. My theory is, marry someone you think is your better half. Someone you think is the best, at least in your own eyes, someone you adore, you worship, you crazily in love with. This apply to guys too. Don't you go marry someone just because you think she's a good cook, raise you good kids and could make your family photo looks cosy and warm. It will be the same like hiring someone to do or help you do those chores, right. You also have to adore, worship and crazily in love with this person.

If we think 'It is better to marry a guy who loves you more than you love him', it's like, fuh...good, we don't have to labour so much love. The lesser love I contribute, the safer and happier I am? Don't tell me, everyone is agreeing and applying this theory?? Ok, maybe you were badly hurt in a relationship before, so you wanted to play safe and granted this thought?? Please don't. Please continue to believe true love still exist.

My rule of thumb is simple, love like how you want to be loved in return. Yes, I will.......when I found my better half.

I hope I'm not living in fantasy realm and what I'm believing is not myth.

Here's a song that's so right for the mood while pondering bout this....


  1. here here! i agree with every word you say - there should never be anyone better than the person you have chosen to spend your life with :)

  2. Exactly the same replied from me to my friend when she asked about the ' who should love whom more' question.As typical all prefer to play safe and selfish.

    I don't know if it is love cos now i'm crazily worshiping this man that doesn't even know me..is this love ?


    sorry for crapping at your blog ah.^^ Btw,nice art works u got here ! keep up the good work .


  3. I'm glad...someone agrees :)